BOB'S RANDOM
THOUGHTSThese have absolutely no purpose other than I miss writing articles. You can read a little about me on my homepage.
"Never let it be said that I didn't do the least I could do." "We were never sure what the guy believed in, but he always did the right thing anyway."
FLU SHOT & VALENTINES
I guess next year I am going for the flu shot. I am always afraid the shot will make me sick. Cheryn and I both have had lung congestion and a croopy cough since Christmas. I think we are finally both getting over it but still end up taking cough syrup before bedtime and here it is Valentines day. Took Cheryn out to the iHop and let here order anything she wanted off the seniors menu. Who says I ain't still a romantic cuss. It did happen to coincide with the Mac User Group Board meeting but hey that still should count.
GUY STUFF
When you first heard that Seal and Heidi Klume were splitting, didn't you think just for a second "hey maybe I got a shot now". Sure she is going to go for a fat middle age married balding guy. I guess it is wired into us though.
MOTHER KNOWS BEST
My mother said always pick a dentist or surgeon with small hands. I understand that after seeing the gall bladder scar and seeing Dr. Benin's banana sized fingers.
She also tells the girls to never marry a man who's mother irons his underwear. He is already ruined and you will never meet his expectations.DAD KNOWS BEST
My Dad says if you open the door for your date by unlocking her side and letting her in, take notice if she reaches over and unlocks your door for you. He says that is how you can tell a keeper. A bit dated these day with the automatic locks but hopefully you get the point. He also told me that you can tell a good one by how straight their purse is and how clean the trunk of their car is. Always best to avoid slobs.
My Dad when visiting nursing homes always carries sugar free gum and mints. He always talked to folks and would offer them. Always put a smile on their faces. I told him I thought it was nice of him and he said, what are you talking about have you ever smelled old peoples breath. He of course was joking but that was his sense of humor.
JERRY MODESTO KNOWS BEST
I worked with a guy and we would go to lunch together every now and then. We would sometimes go to one of the cafeterias. Jerry would always engage the line workers and tell them how good the food looked and ask it they made that etc. One thing I begin to realize is how smart that was as he could hardly carry his tray to his table from all the extra large portions. Being nice don't cost a thing and brings a little bit of cheer to others. More often than not the rewards are well worth the effort in that extra large piece of chicken or that extra large serving.
HOW TO COOK A TURKEY - SOUTHERN METHOD
Brine the Turkey. We use a Covey Cooler to put our brine of sugar and salt. 1/2 cup brown sugar, 1 cup salt per gallon. Add a bit of ice and put the cover on. Let stand at least 6 hours or so adding ice if needed. About 10 or 11 PM the night before Thanksgiving preheat the oven to 500 degrees. Pull the Turkey from the brine and pat dry, remember to remove the giblet packet from inside. We put a whole onion and chopped celery inside and lube the turkey up with vegetable oil. Salt and pepper the turkey and add any other seasonings. Put the turkey in a roasting pan and cover with aluminum foil and place in the 500 degree oven. Cook the turkey 5 minutes per pound. After the time is up shut the oven off and go to bed. When you wake up in the morning you will have a perfectly cooked juicy turkey. Reheat to serve. This works perfectly everytime unless you have one of those ovens that automatically cools itself down. The leftover oven heat continues to cook the turkey.
OPTION: What we do these days is cook the turkey at 500 degrees for the alloted 5 minutes per pound and turn the oven off. I fire up our barrel charcoaler just before pulling the turkey after the alloted cook time. With the fire on one side and the turkey over a drip pan with water on the other. I place smoke packets made up from punctured foil and soaked fruit wood cuttings on the charcoal bed. After a couple of hours I add another chimney of charcoal and fresh smoke packs. I then go to bed. In the morning I have a perfectly cooked turkey with a nice coke colored smoke layer over the outside of the Turkey. Best eating ever. Add the foil panties and bra before starting the smoke process.
WARNING: We do check doneness by cutting the Leg Joint. Any pink around the joint means you need to cook the turkey a bit longer before serving. We do this by putting it back in the oven at 400 a while longer. If you did everything right above though you will never need to do this.
Click here to see Cheryn's Turkey
34th ANNIVERSARY
Cheryn and I have been married 34 years. We were married November 1, 1977 All Saints Day, at the courthouse in Oklahoma City. We probably won't do much of anything special except maybe go to the Peanut Steak Place this coming weekend. Actually we ended up going to the Blue Plate Cafe, I had the fried chicken dark and she had the chicken fried steak, no gravy. It is best to get married on a holiday that way you can remember your anniversary. I know if there are trick or treaters I need to remember our anniversary the next day. We are having goulash for lunch today. Cheryn makes it with porky since I am slightly allergic to beef. I try not to eat any and when I do I make sure I eat a good cut of beef like they have at the Peanut Steak Place. She mixes equal parts of ground dark meat turkey with ground pork. She adds a bit of seasoning salt, garlic and onion powder, and worchestire sauce to make it taste a bit more beeflike. Cooked with her goulash seasonings over noodles I can't tell the difference. Same for her porky chili. The burgers are not quite right but are okay and better than none. We ended up going to a couple of Walgreens to get my sinus medication. I have to go in and sign for it since the meth labs use it to make meth. It really is a nuisance and I hear they may even make it prescription again. Whatever happens I bet they charge more.
STEVE JOBS DEATH
As we were eating our usual Chinese dinner and our favorite restaurant Cheryn's cell phone rang. Our daughter told her that Jobs had died. I think I will always remember where I was when I heard it. I feel like we should all be wearing black arm bands today. If we had an Operator Headgap business flag it would be at half mast.
Anyone who knows us knows that we are Mac Nazis. Being in the used computer business we sometimes buy large lots of systems and when we find a PC in the lot we gut it and send it to the recycler. Anyone who knows anything about computers would never use a PC. You and your information are instantly compromised once you connect to the Internet with 3 new viruses everyday and many thousands of web pages that infect your PC just by viewing them (thanks Flash). I don't care who you are and how much you spend on your firewall and virus protection software you can't block what you don't know about yet. Best they can do is come up with a patch after you have been electronically raped.
I can't say I always agree with what Apple does but their tenacity to keep moving things up has given us a decent income. You see each time they update their hardware and software they leave behind the old software and hardware. Many people like the software they are using and have an investment both in time and money. The new Lion OS that just came out killed all the PowerPC programs. Many thousands of folks who use Quicken, QuickBooks, Corel products, and older versions of Adobe products etc. cannot use a new Mac. Good for us. Thanks Steve for leaving us alone to sell your old computers and old software. Also thanks for building long lasting and well built products. We enjoy giving them second lives. We will miss your "Oh Yes and One More Thing" that you always added to your product introductions. You indeed changed the world as I type this listening to my iTunes music library.
DOGS, CATS AND LONG MEMORIES
I remember my first cat. I didn't name it my dad did. It's name was damn cat. That is what he always called it. He would tell my mother things like "get that damn cat out of here", or "the damn cat has spit up another furball". My dads poker buddies learned the name of our cat when I told my mother that the damn cat was hiding under the table. Being 3 years old or perhaps a little younger I still remember how funny they thought it was. So I would make sure and call the cat by name anytime adults were present.
My mother didn't think anything about me remembering my early years because she did too. It wasn't until much later that I learned most folks don't remember that far back. I asked her about the old rent house and she said I probably shouldn't remember it since I was about 1-1/2 years old when they moved out. I don't remember it in great detail but described the linoleum floor to her and she said that was definitely it. I guess crawling around on it stuck with me since it was about the only thing I saw of the place. The house we lived in after that we lived in until I was 8 and I still remember it in great detail. My brother was born when I was 4 and I mark time by that since it was a major event.
I had several dogs as a child, but most got too large and were unsuitable. Especially the one that kept biting me in the face. They gave Corky (retriever mix) to my cousins who lived on a farm. I don't remember the Water Spaniels name but he used to sit on the copper yard sprinkler and any water I got to play in was after it went off the dog. My next dog I dearly loved. His name was Mickey and he was a Rat Terrier. Small and good natured he was a good pal for a youngster. One day Mickey disappeared. I was in a panic. My folks told me he probably got out. When he didn't show up for a day or two they said the dog catcher probably got him. I remember crying at the back cyclone fence since he hadn't show up when I called. I begged them to take me to the pound to look for Mickey but they never did. You see what they didn't tell me was what they knew. He had gotten out and got hit by a car. I did not learn the truth until I was a teenager. I really never got over it. You shouldn't lie to your children even if they are only 3 or 4 years old. Some of us never forget.
I have mostly had cats after that. They stay around a few years and don't really care other than you meeting their needs. When they inevitably pass on it is not like the love a boy has for his dog.
LAWN TRACTOR
We have a narrow gate and I was pleased when we found a Murray at an affordable price that fit the gate and worked well. That was 10 years ago. I have learned that changing the oil yearly and using a synthetic keeps the engines in good stead. The transmission is going now and I only have one forward speed an no brakes. Still it did the job although I have to be careful not to be knocked off going under trees. Luckily the kill switch works if I fall or get knocked off of the tractor. I had recently been sick and poor Cheryn had to used the tractor to keep the lawn. After her last time the tractor wouldn't start. A quick trip to the parts store for a new battery, new fuel filter and line and a gallon of premium I figured would take care of it. Cheryn pulled the gas tank and discovered the remnants of the cap gasket and other trash. We added fresh fuel and replaced the line and filters and charged up the battery. Still no go. I could run it off the Berrymans spray but the fuel just wasn't feeding. I opened the float bowl and let gas run out to clear it. Still no go. I finally pulled the fuel bowl off. About 1/4" of rust and other bits. That fixed it. It runs fine now other than the excitement of no brakes and one speed. If you don't know about Berrymans Spray and Liquid you should. They are the best solvents for your fuel system. I use Berrymans in all our vehicles, pouring in a 1/2 can to the crankcase prior to an oil change and the other half in the fuel. You will never have fuel problems and always have a clean engine if you do this. When we change the plugs we spray about 1/2 a can through the throttle body while the engine is running to knock down and carbon or varnish deposits. Once you use it to clean anything varnished up with gas you will see why I think so highly of it.
Oh Yes. Happy 56th Birthday for Cheryn Aug. 19. We celebrated in usual fashion at the peanut steak place. I forget sometimes how lucky I am that my wife is not only willing but fairly good at things mechanical. She cleaned the gas tank and removed the battery for our parts store run and helped with the wrenching of the tractor repair. As usual she cleans up all the tools and hides them in places only she knows. I guess I am lucky as long as she is around to find the tools again. She used to keep some of them out in the yard but the tractor kept tearing them up, so she hides them elsewhere now.
FLASHES OF LIGHT IN MY EYES
On occasion I have flashes of light in the left eye. They are usually a bright gold and look like a string of alien text. Perhaps they are sending me messages. It is enough to where I have to refocus to be able to read. I looked it up on Google and it is a fairly common occurrence. Nobody seems to know what causes it but it seems nothing to worry about. It generally goes away on its own. Still disconcerting and makes you wonder if you are having a mini stroke or something else. Cheryn seems to think it is because I sit on my ass too much. I later found out that it is a precursor to a severe headache for me. I guess they are migraines as they are indeed severe. Fortunately I always keep old pain killer scrips and use them to knock down a bad one. I am not sure what triggers them but I hope to figure it out as it is something I indeed plan to avoid in the future.
ALLERGIES/DRUG INTERACTION
I have always had seasonal allergies. I didn't realize it until Cheryn went to work for a doctor and our medical records were transferred to him. He pointed out that I have been sick twice a year (same months to within a week) since I was 3 years old. Spring and Fall. It turns out tree pollens in the Spring and Ragweed in the Fall are the source of my miseries. I went to an allergy doctor for a while and spent a lot of money being tested. They eventually come up with a list of what you are allergic to and come up with an injection. After being sick every time I took a shot he went back and ran some of the panels again only to find out my allergic responses had changed. He didn't know what to think but realized I would not be able to continue the therapy. I finally went back to the doctor Cheryn worked for and he asked me what my symptoms were. We eventually came up with me taking a combination of a time release Guafenesin and Pseudoephedrine. These sold as Zephrex and other brand names until our brilliant regulators changed the requirements of how they are made. Now I have to buy over the counter versions at 1/2 strength and have to sign for them since part of the contents are abused. Still I live a normal life mostly and haven't had sinus infections for many years.
I recently started taking Pravastatin to help lower my cholesterol. It seems to be working and my cholesterol was quickly whipped into shape. About the same time though I started getting an itchy rash in spots. The doctor gave me a steroid lotion and it sort of took care of it. But over time it kept getting worse. Since the Pravastatin was the only thing I had changed recently I quit taking them for a couple of weeks. It didn't seem to help so I started taking it again. The itchy rash continued to worsen. Eventually the lotion I was using started making it worse.
I went back to the doctor after reading that Pravastatin had a listed side effect of rash. He told me to quit taking it and mentioned that it would take a couple of weeks to leave my system. I was on the right track but didn't quit taking it long enough earlier. He prescribed Singulair which is normally used for Asthma along with Zyrtec and Zantec. These are 3 different types of antihistamines that work on different receptors. He could have prescribed a steroid but I loath them and usually have the bounce back after taking them not to mention headaches and stomach problems. I need to mention that the Singulair was $153 for 30 days. Thank God he gave me a coupon that knocked it down to $147. Cheryn found we can order a generic from India for $40 a month. I don't plan on taking any more after I get over this though.
I eventually developed a itching rash over 90% of my body. I couldn't sleep and ran fevers. My skin almost appeared burned and I had a tendency to scratch until I bled. The antihistamines are finally starting to work and the Pravastatin is leaving my system. I got to where I couldn't sleep and have been pretty consumed and unable to function for days now. I found that mineral oil based lotions mixed with Olive Oil and Solarcaine gave me the most relief. I am finally starting to clear up after losing about a week of my life. I tried just about every lotion you could get from the Dollar store up to about everything Walgreens, Walmart and Targer carry. The best lotion to buy anywhere for anyone is Ji'vu Body Lotion For People Of Color even if your color happens to be white. When I was at my worst it was the only lotion that didn't burn when I applied it. It soaks in better and stays on longer. It is worth running down. We know the owners and repair their Mac systems. I also use plain old drug store Witch Hazel for relief from the itching. It is cheap and works immediately.
I guess I won't worry about my cholesterol so much. I really never did but the doctors these days think these are the best thing since sliced bread. My numbers were over 200 though and went down to 150 or so which made him happy. I won't risk the allergic reaction though and doubt I will be taking any statins ever again.
P.S. I finish up my scrips this Thursday 8-11-2011. My skin completely cleared up and even the odd patch of psoriasis I am plagued with looked better. Of course I am starting to break out again with different looking itchy bumps. Arghh!
BE PREPARED
My wife and I are both from Oklahoma and have seen a Tornado or two growing up, and weathered a few ice storms. We always have had kerosene lanterns, lamp oil, flashlights and extra batteries, a battery power radio and other essentials set aside in case of bad weather. Years later we add a propane cook stove, several large insulated containers (to keep your refrigerated goods in), battery backups, and even a high capacity 110V inverter that hooks to one of our vehicles. We have had a few storms over the years that have turned off our power from a few days to almost a week. Every spring we check our supplies, restocking batteries, lamp oil, propane etc. The time to find out you are out is not right after the storm. It isn't a bad idea to have a few extra cans of beans in the pantry. During the ice storms when we finally could get out many of the stores were closed since they also had no power.
Keeping your important papers in a strong box or a safety deposit box is something you should consider. We also keep a backup of our essential computer data on thumb drives off site.
We also know which parts of the house are likely to survive a Tornado and make sure he have the junk out of the way in case we need to duck in quickly.
KNOW WHAT YOU GOT
I had a fellow call the other day and he said he had a Mac Pro PowerMac G4 iBook. I thought to myself and I bet he drives a Ford Lincoln Mercury Chevrolet. To be fair though it is confusing with all the different models out there. Just try to make sure you know what you are using and what OS version you are running if you are calling for help.
HAD A GOOD BIRTHDAY
I turned 57 on May 29th. Went and had steak at the peanut place, you know the steak house with the bucket of peanuts on each table. Went down and picked out a new mattress. The old one after 15 years had gotten to the point it was lumpy the day after you rotated it. Got the one with the pocketed coils. Would have liked to had a memory foam job but the price is just too high. When did foam rubber get more expensive the the labor intensive manufacture of individual pocketed coils of steel? Got two pair of Internet reading glasses in bifocals. One with 3X for real close work and another at 1.5 for reading old discolored paperbacks in low light that I do each night before bed. I had drug store glasses but couldn't look up at anything without throwing up. The bifocals are a bit more practical for folks with good distance vision. I also got a new padded toilet seat which was just in time as the old one was beginning to need duct tape. Cheryn went all out and picked me up my favorite red velvet cake at the Costco. She use to make them from scratch but to be honest these taste better. I think she thinks so too or perhaps it is just easier. I ran the truck through the RoboWash at got the full $10 wash. Beats slugging quarters like I usually do. Watch old submarine movies on the DirecTV until bedtime.
KNACKLESS
Usually most people figure out what they have a knack for doing. Others are knackless. When you find out what you have a knack for you should try to find work that incorporates it or at least a couple of hobbies. Sometimes asking someone else what they think your knack is if you don't know. Let's just hope it isn't drinking beer and watching football. While possibly a good hobby it wouldn't be the best thing to have carved on your gravestone and would be difficult to turn into an occupation.
RETARDED
I think many of the people who report the news are retarded. Why else would they be following Sarah Palin's RV around or listening to anything Trump has to say. Are people getting dumber? I guess that is probably it since the SCI-FI channel now has wrestling on Friday nights and many of our programs are being replaced by "reality" shows. I find them to be bad soap operas with worse actors and have no tolerance for them at all. For the life of me I can't see how anyone could watch Ghost Hunters. Grown men scaring each other in darkened old houses and buildings shot under Night Vision with equipment so highly tuned it gets set off when one of them combs their hair. Brainless, mindless is the only thing I can say.
SOMETIMES YOU GET A DEAL
A local fellow stopped by the other day and brought his PowerMac G5. He said is was collecting dust (he bought a new Mac Pro so he could run Snow Leopard) and wanted to know if we wanted to buy it. I benched it and it was a bone stock 2.7 Ghz DUAL G5. I don't buy or sell the liquid cooled G5's usually since you run the risk of bad failure. When a liquid cooled unit gives it up it sometimes sprays coolant all over the insides of the computer causing catastrophic failure of the unit. Repairing one runs higher than the value of the unit. I told the fellow this and he said that what would we give him. I thought about it and realized I wouldn't do this to a customer but I would run the risk myself if the price was right. We gave him wholesale value of one of the low end units which he was happy with. It is now sitting under my desk. I now am running a DUAL 2.7 GHZ G5 with one 750 GB and a 1 Terabyte Seagate Hard Drive, 6 GB RAM, and a new Pioneer SuperDrive. I didn't need it but the old unit I was running will pay for the new one. Sometimes you get a deal you know. Let's just hope it is a few years before the pump gaskets blow.
We do buy select good used Mac computers, use the online form to send info.
SUCKERS
I sometimes am amazed when I see advertising for stupid things. The latest is the National Monument Two Dollar Bills. Boy give me a world where I can sell $4 for $10 plus shipping and handling. Oh sure they ran the bills through a color laser and imprinted national parks images on them. Perhaps I should come up with the Legends of Nascar Five Dollar Bill.
HDMI CABLE SCAMS
When I hooked up my new Flat Panel TV, Satellite Box, and DVD Player I realized I was short a cable. I went down to the local discounter and they wanted $39 for a 4 foot cable. Granted it was in one of those security plastic carton (you know the ones you have to open with a chain saw) with a big label telling all the features. I buy the same cable in an easy to open plastic bag with no label. It has the same gold plated connectors, same quality wiring etc. We sell them for $7.99 and include shipping. Buy ours and take back the overpriced cables.
AUCTION SCAMS - DON'T BE A PUMPKIN EATER
It is disturbing to me when I see lots of dough spent on TV and Web Advertising by obvious crooks. You have seen these. Joe Smo got a new Mustang for $11 or some such. These sites charge for each bid you make. With thousands of bids per item you can quickly run up quite a bill for nothing. You really don't know if Joe got the Mustang or not but you will get the bill for all the bids you made not to get anything. I simply can't understand how gullible people are but they must be since the companies manage to keep paying for expensive advertising. I understand what pumpkin eaters are. They are people who are so gullible they will swallow anything.
Common Carpet Spiders
I woke up the other morning with a pair of tiny bites on my belly. They had inflamed a patch around them and itched like the devil. Spider bites I suspect but perhaps it is a snakebite since they are evenly spaced. I put some steroid creme and a little Solarcaine on them. Solarcaine has lanocaine and camphor in it and is a useful product for much more than sunburn since it does a good job of numbing the area it is applied to. With that in mind make sure you don't put it on your lips accidentally and absolutely don't rub your eyes. I prefer the lotion to the spray since I usually inhale it and in makes my lungs numb. Everyone should have a bottle in their first aid kit.
I went looking for a spider and found one. It was a common carpet spider. If it had been on a wall it would have been a common wall spider. I am great at identifying common insects and arachnids this way. My daughter has also learned the same technique for quickly identifying common insects. When she was about 6 she finally figured it out. When she saw a spider on the wall outside I told her it was a common brick spider. Later on she asked me to identify another one and I told her it was a common hose spider. She had previously watched the brick wall spider move to the garden hose.
I looked at the spider and for all the world to me it looked like it was chewing gum. I am not sure what brand and didn't want to get close enough to smell his breath. For all I know though it could have been chunks from my belly he was chewing. I bent over to better stare at him but couldn't tell which eyes to focus on. I hopped two steps to the left and two steps to the right when I was sure he was looking at me. He leaped at me. I immediately stomped him into a greasy spot on the carpet and left it there as a warning to other spiders. I am not sure if he was the one who had bit me on the belly or not. I do feel a bit better now though.
Doctors
I went to the doctor for my every 6 months checkup. I spoke to his nurse in training giving her my type written list of medications I take. Cheryn prepares one for me. I take a couple of blood pressure medications, a cholesterol lowering drug, and use a steroid lotion for the psoriasis which so far has been mainly a nuisance. I have to go in fasting so they can draw my blood without the benefit of breakfast invading my sample.
I was fortunate to find doctor that sets appointments that he really keeps. He is a little more expensive but not having to sit in a waiting room of sick people or on that papered table is worth it to me. I guess he is fairly rare these days.
We usually chat about how much bacon or beef fat to add to your venison so you can actually eat it. He looks in my nose and ears and to my chest. His staff has already drawn my blood and checked my pressure so he simply reads that from the charts. He waits patiently for me to volunteer any other complaints and most of the time he simply says wait a while and it will go away.
You have to appreciate a guy like this. Most would have pulled out their scrip pads and written up a few hundred dollars of whatever the latest and most expensive drugs are for something that goes away on its own. He really is right most of the time by the way and the few times he missed I simply called in and he sent a scrip to by pharmacy for the latest generic available. I think I will keep this one. I just hope he lives longer than I do. It is really frustrating having to break in a new one. Pick a fairly young one if you can.
I used to go to the only Osteopath in Memphis. Back in OKC there were dozens as they had a teaching hospital. The main difference in them I think is they do a bit of bone cracking and aren't so quick to give you prescriptions if something else will do. I like him well enough but he finally got too old and retired. We got acquainted with Osteopaths back when Cheryn as a nurse. She is an LPN which stands for Licensed Practical Nurse. That that boils down to is 2 years of school and not the 4 years of an RN.
She worked Oncology and Emergency Room at South Community Hospital in OKC for a few years and eventually went to work for a Doctors office. The doctor she went to work for was the smartest doctor I ever met, Dr. Henry Tomlinson. He had both a full MD license and was also an Osteopath. I hold him directly responsible for saving my Grandmothers life. She had an infected gall bladder and the hospital was sending her home (to die). Dr. Tomlinson took over her care and got her electrolytes back in balance so she would survive the surgery. She lived another 10 years.
If you are to get an injection and the nurse is young pull down your pants and underwear immediately and all the way to your ankles. It often surprises them and they don't know how to react. If it is an old nurse don't waste your time. Nothing surprises them. It is best to get an injection from someone experienced and surprising the young nurse usually gets you a more experienced replacement in short order.
News
I am not sure what happened but the news people I grew up with didn't give their opinions on the air and they never had their own agenda. Of course we know they all did and selectively reported to support their agendas. Every once in a while though you could see the reporter making a face while he was reported something he considered stupid.
Nowadays with the advent of FOX News you get nothing but opinions. MSNBC gives you the other opinion sort of. Watching John Stewart on Comedy Central will give you a clearer picture of what is really happening by what he makes fun of. At least you might have a better picture of what really is going on.
Too much of the news though is like a Seinfield show. Much ado about nothing.
People and Pets
When I was a teenager I worked for a now defunct chain store known as TG&Y. Those initials stand for Turtles, Girdles and Yo Yo's or Tomlinson, Gosselin and Young depending on who you ask. I worked in the Pet Department of the worlds largest at 74th & Penn in OKC back then. I helped customers with Tropical Freshwater and Marine Fish, Hamsters and Mice, Parakeets and a lot more. I had a lady and her daughter come in a pick out a parakeet. I caught the bird and did a quick inspection before boxing him up. The very next day they came back with the box and the woman said the bird was dead. I pulled the bird's corpse from the box and noticed it was pretty mangled up. I asked the woman what had happened and she said she simply found the bird dead. The daughter volunteered "Mommy he was okay till the dog got him". The woman grabbed her daughters hand and left. I would have replaced the bird if she would have hung around. But I might have also suggested she wipe the slobber off the bird before returning it next time.
I had guy and his son come in a pick out a turtle. This is back before the government got involved and stopped the sale of the turtles due to the possibility of salmonella. I think most people know not to put them in their mouths but you know how kids are. Really though no one really needs a turtle and most don't make it to long after the purchase so it probably wasn't a real bad thing. I still remember fondly watching my little turtle when I was a boy swimming around in that little plastic turtle bowl with the little palm tree. He brought the turtle back the next day deceased. I inspected the dead turtle and noticed the bottom of the turtles shell was skinned up bit. No big deal I though and let his son pick out a new one. A few days later this one had died. Again the skinned up bottom carapace. I told the guy I had never seen anything like that before and we usually had good luck with the turtles. I let the boy pick out his turtle replacement and I put him down on the floor in front of the kid. He picked up the turtle by the sides and began sliding him across the floor like a little car and shouting vroom vroom. I asked the guy if this would be cash or charge.
Grover Palfrey was the store manager when I first started working for TG&Y. My early opinion of him was that he was a very serious man. I always tried to look busy when he was around. One day he came down to the pet department where I was working and about picked me up by the back of my neck. He marched me down to his office where a young lady was sitting very obviously in tears. She looked up and at me and said "that's not him". Boy talk about relief. Come to find out someone had scared the poor girl with a snake. He evidently knew me a little better than I thought he did, but I would never scare someone with a snake. I have seen big strapping full grown men injure themselves trying to get away from what they thought was a snake but that is another story. I was a little bit of a practical joker, I just tried not to cause serious injury.
I did get to know Grover much better through my long association with TG&Y. He moved up the ladder as I did and I really learned a lot from him over the years. He even followed me (I am sure indirectly) to Memphis for a time when he went to work for Wang's International which I worked for many years as well. I think he is back in OKC now. I do miss his counsel.
For a time we carried exotic pets like woolly monkeys, macaques, marmosets, exotic birds of all kinds as well as snakes and other reptiles.
The Boa Constrictors were especially interesting since you may order a 6 footer and get one that is more like 10 foot. We had one that was really too large for the 55 gallon aquarium with steel lid that we had him in. He would get out at night and get into the parakeets and otherwise escape. You would think it would be easy to find a snake that large but this store was something like 140,000 square feet and attached directly to a grocery store.
Remember me telling you about full grown men injuring themselves? Well the Boa had been out about a month and we have just about given up on finding him with the heavy set fellow from hardware come running down the aisle. Sweating and excited he said he had found the snake. It had hidden out in the wood molding rack in the hardware department. Of course we got out the welders gloves and made a show of capturing him.
We had just received a South American shipment of exotics and was pulling a large Boa from the gunny sack they ship them in. We would put antibiotic salve on their nose and mouth since the sometime would have injured themselves and would pull any ticks off with a pair of needle nose and doctor the wounds up. Needless to say the snakes were not happy after spending an air flight in a sack in the cargo hold and then to be handled immediately after getting out of the bag. A French women of small stature ran the Pet Dept. Another fellow that worked there was a guy named Jerry. Jerry was a little older. We were all helping when the Boa decided he had had enough and latched onto Jerry's arm. Boa's don't have teeth per say but lets just say that ridge they do have had little ridges to keep its prey from escaping without serious damage. Jerry of course panicked and was spinning round and round and screaming. Little Yvette tackled him. She and I both realized that unless we got them both calm we would have to amputate, and I likes snakes slightly better than Jerry. He finally calmed down and so did the snake who really wasn't big enough to swallow him. Jerry took the rest of the day off.
It wasn't long before he escaped again. He had been gone about a week. I was waiting on customers picking out tropical fish when I noticed one of the tanks filters wasn't working. I reached up under the little cloth curtains to adjust the hidden air valves. I will tell you now I am not afraid of snakes but when that 10 footer stuck his head out from behind the curtains and hissed at me, I screamed like a woman. The woman standing next to me picking out fish didn't scream at all. She just passed out and her head hit the floor with a thunk. The ambulance showed up a bit later and carted her off. We sold the last of the snakes out a week later and didn't carry them anymore. Later I found out that I screamed loud enough the people in the grocery store heard me.
I always paid attention to the people around me in the workplace. Jerry was always in the habit of turning on the sink in the dept. and quickly rinsing his hands. The sink was added after an expansion and they had to install an electric water heater directly below the sink. I would run the hot water until it was almost scalding when no one was paying attention. Of course Jerry or Yvette would reach over to rinse off their hands and a blast of hot water would be the first to come out. Really funny until the found out it was me and did the same trick to me.
Hey Dig Out Billy
When I was a kid a family lived down the street. The kids (and the old man) had one less layer of skin than normal giving them a red coloration. My dad always called my friend Peachy. Peachy had a younger brother named Billy. He was about the same color but to avoid confusion we just called him Billy. Billy was an industrious lad and worked since he was 14 for a cafeteria busing tables, dishwashing etc. for less than minimum wage. He saved ever dime and eventually he had enough to buy a car. Back then the old embargo was in full swing and while we never had the lines in Oklahoma gas was expensive. People were dumping their old gas guzzlers. Billy found a Dodge Super Bee he could afford on his meager earnings. This had the 440 Magnum and headers and was obviously souped up a bit from stock from the sound of that loping cam. We all went down and looked it over and my brother was really impressed with the old car. He said Billy and him went down to the corner and had stopped when he encouraged Billy to Dig Out. He quickly lost control of the car and it went careening over into the natural gas substation for the neighbor hood. Fortunately there were the steel pipes filled with concrete that protected the gas main. It still totaled out the car. I don't think Billy ever bought another car and the last time I saw him he was still walking to work.
Bikes
When I had just turned 13 my uncle Rocky brought me what was left of my cousins bike. He like to tip the bottle a bit and had drug the bike behind the truck a ways when he was hauling it. My cousin got a brand new replacement. I got the damaged bike. Mom probably had something to do with that since she knew I can fix anything. I was very pleased however since I had wanted to build me a Stingray type bike and my old fashioned 24" bike was just that, old fashioned. I started saving up and bought the pieces I needed. I took out the 3 speed handlebar switchable shift bendix and had the guy at the bike shop pull the bendix from my 24" bike. He was supposed to charge me a nickel a spoke but when my dad took me to pick it up the guy gave him a flat price that was much lower. I about said something about him not charging enough but my dad told me to hush. Learned something that day. Take your Dad when you buy stuff. Dad never pays retail by the way.
I took the pedals which were new off my old bike and put them in place of the skinned up ones. Bought a white metal flake seat cover and a lot of other pieces including a long gooseneck and new handlebars and white metallic grips. Now I had all the pieces I needed.
I sanded the bike all the way to the metal after completely disassembling it. It was some kind of orange red metallic but was all skinned up and had crappie factory decals all over it. That took me a couple of days. I spray primered the metal and the light sanded it smooth. I applied 3 coats of silver base and 6 coat of candy sapphire blue. I then rubbed it out using light compound and finished up with carnuba wax.
I then reassembled the bike. I had to take some links out of the chain. That larger rear gear and the small front gear made it easy to peddle and easily to pull a wheelie. It originally had hand brakes front and back but when I added the rear bendix it gave me the old pedal back brake on the rear. I left the front hand brake for extra braking power.
I later added a chrome chain guard, new cheater slick rear tire and skinny front tire with metal valve stem inner tubes. I also replaced the front fork from the Sears catalogs with one that came from the all chrome spyder model they use to sell. One good looking bike with all that extra chrome.
Remember Peachy? He had a really old 20" bike that had the enamel rims and balloon tires. They had several layers of brush paint on them and the bike itself had dozens of brush paint jobs on it. I told him I would help him rebuild his bike. We pulled it apart and cleaned all the layers of paint off the frame and the wheels. It took days and we started by using a knife to carve off the layers of paint. We finally got it down to the metal. I sanded his rims smooth first and I sprayed them first with primer and light sanded them again until they were perfectly smooth. I then used a chrome silver to give them a final finish and even painted the spokes. He decided on black for the frame. I primered it and light sanded it. We then put 6 coats of gloss black enamel and after it cured with rubbed it out and waxed it before reassembly. We cleaned up the rest of the parts and repacked all the gears with fresh grease. It looked great.
A few days later Peachy comes riding up on this bike and he had brush painted it orange. You just can't help some people.
At 16 I was talking to a neighbor kid. I sold him my pride and joy bike for $35. I could have got more if I advertised it but the kid didn't have a bike and not that much money. Lots of dough for gas money back in those days. I just wish sometimes I had some pictures of it.
Peachy used to put Pet Milk in his tires. In Oklahoma we had a thorn that grew in the pastures we called goat heads. They would flat ruin a bike tube and not make you very happy if you are barefoot. The Pet Milk would clot and block up the small holes something like a poor mans fix a flat. Well Peachy took his bike up to the Gulf Station around the corner. If old Pete was there he would rush out to help the kids fill up their bike tires. He had a high pressure compressor and he worried about the kids. Well Peachy did it himself and sure enough he blew up the tire. I can't really describe the odor that 6 month old Pet Milk from inside a bike tire smells like. Lets just say Pete was washing the drive for the next few days. I swear years later when I was filling up my car every so often I think I caught a whiff.
Grounded For Life
There were a few things that I was either involved or simply witnessed. I managed not to get caught most of the time, unlike some of these guys.
First let me say I had nothing to do with burning the large pasture that was behind our house when I was a kid. Sure was pretty and green though the next spring. I did burn up the rug on the back porch when I was 3 and the dog was really not involved other than being a witness. I do regret burning up my uncle Glenn's football helmet in the trash barrel. You have to admit though my parents should have left me unattended with a fire burning in the trash barrel.
I grew up around a pair of twins named Vic and Vince. They did look alike but for anyone who spent any time with them it was easy to tell them apart. They did look enough alike though that one year they had the same picture twice (I think Vince) representing both of them in the schools yearbook.
One day I was visiting their cousin. They were sitting on the porch with an old aquarium covered with a stainless steel lid. There were a bunch of guys around so I had to see what was up. They had come back from the big rattlesnake hunt up in Mangum Okla. with a pair of baby rattlers. They were betting that you couldn't hold your eyes open when the snake stuck at the glass. Of course you can't.
Later I heard that they had taken the snakes home and they escaped into the house. Their dad took them all to a hotel that night and I had heard he had grounded them for life. It must have been so I haven't seen them since.
I later heard a story about them but don't know if it is true or not. One of them got in trouble with the law. When the witness was asked to identify the culprit he pointed to the other twin (the only one in the courtroom at the time). The other twin had a strong alibi and I heard the case was dropped after the witness had identified the wrong one. Good lawyer.
If you are a little guy choose big friends
My Dad was a Golden Glove Boxer and good at it if you count all the trophies he had. He said he never lost a fight and was a Flyweight Champion. He taught us how to box. He says everyone needs to know how to defend themselves. Even with boxing though he told us to hit them in the throat if they were larger than we were and to do it before the fight started. He pointed out that a bigger person can cause serious damage or even kill you, and if you felt that threatened take them out immediately. I only did this once to a guy that was picking on one of my friends who was smaller than I was. He was several years older and a whole head taller. I guess I really hurt the guy because he just stood there making gagging noises and I never had any trouble with him after that.
The best thing he told me was to make friends with the biggest guy in the school but to avoid the braggarts and bullies. I met a Sioux Indian boy named Bruce. He lived around the corner from me but I had never met him until Junior High. His folks were originally from Michigan. He was a quiet fellow but nice enough and the real benefit was that he had a swimming pool. I lost track of Bruce after high school, although I still think of him and always considered him a good friend.
In metal shop we had overheard the metal shop and woodwork teachers talking. They were going to bring in a forklift to move the anvil. I think it was a 500 pounder but I may not have remembered it properly. All I know is when no one was looking Bruce moved it to where the teacher wanted it. He never told anyone but I imagine the teacher is still wondering to this day. This was in 8th grade. I went over to push it and I could move it at all.
I had a bully bothering me. You know the type. I mentioned it to Bruce and although he never told me someone said he had buried the kid up to his neck and was threatening him with a shovel. I never had trouble with that kid again whatever happened. I guess you don't want to get on the bad side of an big Indian. It is hard for me to imagine burying someone up to their neck and them letting it happen to them.
I had another friend in High School and though we were never really close I always spent time talking with him. Nice guy. His name was Hanshue. He was a jock type (marginally) and his sport was shot put. I never ran with the jocks I was too small but Hanshue kept the jocks from bothering me or really anyone smaller. Years later he did all of my air conditioning work on my house and later rent houses. Really good guy and his actions speak to his character. The world needs more like him.
Combining School Systems - Busing - No Child Left Behind and other such horse shit
Memphis City and County Schools are separate at least for now. I moved out of an area that was taken over by the city so my daughter could go to county schools. She is near 30 now and I no longer really care. What I do know is that the City Schools are about substantially behind the County Schools. Of course when they combine the schools system everyone will lose. It may make economic sense I don't know or really care. What it will do is lower the level of education for everyone. I guess it is okay since we won't need any educated workers in our area since the only work will be in warehouses and the fast food industry. You can always get management from out of state, or educated in the private schools.
A school teacher I know recently took early retirement from the City School system. She started this year with 37 students and 28 desks. When she complained to her superior not only did he not do anything he told her it was her problem. Scratch another good teacher. Most all the good ones have long since left to work in other industry or moved to other areas. At one time the better City teachers would leave to work at the more desirable County Schools. Bunch the schools altogether so we can run off the rest of the better teachers sounds like what will happen. Perhaps more private schools will be started so at least a few people can get a decent education.
I spoke with another City school teacher and he says he had a similar problem. He has 34 students and 31 desks. He says it is no problem though since attendance is so bad. He is still optimistic though and says you just have to work with what you have. Personally I would not accept this though and I probably would not have lasted long as a teacher. I don't think we live long enough to put up with this type of crap. They probably would have had me forcibly removed from the premises after I went in and stood on the desk of whoever is in charge of the Memphis schools. I would have started out by saying now that I have your attention there are a few problems that need your immediate action. More people should stand on the bosses desk. It makes them take notice.
I agree we should try to accommodate children with special learning needs. I disagree that we do this at the expense of the rest of the children. Sometimes children need to be left behind hopefully to learn the skills they should have before moving on. 37 kids with 28 desks doesn't allow this to happen for anyone.
When I was a freshman I won the Science Fair garnering the First Place Trophy and won several more awards at the City Science Fair. When I was in my Jr. year of high school I almost dropped out. All the advanced classes I wanted were across town due to the implementation of busing. I would not only lose one class hour a day I would not be able to work by part time job due to riding the bus. They stuck me in a bunch of bonehead classes when I refused to ride the bus. I really didn't need another Gym class, Art class or Study Hall. I simply quit going to school. Luckily I had a counselor (Whittington) that took enough time to look at my transcript and figure out what was wrong. He called me at home. He says "Bob, what they hell are you doing". I told him if I couldn't get decent courses I wasn't going. He asked me to come up and talk with him. He met with me later that day and took me to the government sponsored vo-tech. He introduced me to the Industrial Chemical Technology Teacher (Hershel Diebel) who gave me a tour of the 6 classroom area he taught from. He said they only had 5 students for this two year program. He showed me the Senior College Level Texts they would be using and professional glassware, weight room etc. I finished school with credits from this course ( I aced it) and a bonehead math and English classes back at the high school. I wonder what would have happened though if I could have gotten the classes I really wanted.
What bothers me though is all the unlucky folks who didn't. Brilliant choice busing. Bring down the level of education for everyone. Whatever happened to rewarding the hard working students and letting them excel. If there is no reward for hard work you won't get any. Whoever came up with no child left behind needs to be left behind.
It seems to me that if a child can't read or do simple math in the lower elementary classes that they should receive special attention since without those two functions they are set up for a life of failure. If they have to be held back a year it seems to me it would be well worth the investment and time.
On a senior level perhaps a course or two on how to fill out a resume, how to prepare for a job interview, how to cook a meal, how to balance a checkbook and other life skills would be worthwhile. I know I would not have resented a course like that, but fortunately I had intelligent parents who took care of that for me. I see too many kids these days without these skills though.
EVIL ROTTEN NO GOOD PLANTS
I have already mentioned goat heads. Let me tell you about stinging nettles and bull nettles. In Oklahoma you never go barefoot unless you are an idiot. I did take to wearing what we called thongs (the ones for your feet and not the underwear). They would stop most goat heads and other thorns. Forget it when it comes to nettles. If you walk through a pasture where there are stinging or worse bull nettles you will not soon forget it. We would put creek mud on it, white gas, or kerosene or bluing or bleach. Whatever you did you still suffered. I jumped out of the truck on the way back from the fishing hole and rolled through some bull nettles. They carried me to the tub and put bluing in the cold water they immersed me in. I was pretty sick even so.
Years later I was climbing over the fence and fell into a fire thorn bush. Back in the tub this time with a little bleach. Mother picked out thorns where I couldn't reach for several months after. Avoid fire thorn bushes. Good to plant under your windows if have peeping toms in your neighborhood though.
When I was young I also had a bad case of Poison Ivy. The doctor back then suggested potassium permanganate. This bright purple oxidizer mixed in solution burned like fire and dyed me brownish green. It did clear me up though. Thanks god nowadays they have steroid creams and yes Solarcaine is really the only thing effective for the itching.
HEY STUPID, DON'T ROLL IN THE GRASS YOU WILL GET CHIGGERS!
Until you get chiggers you really won't appreciate this comment. If you live in an area that doesn't have them good for you. They are tiny little red spiders that attach to a pore or hair. They spit a digestive enzyme that dissolves the skin and then they suck the liquefied result back up. Pretty disgusting but the itch is something you won't soon forget. Take my advice. Don't roll in the green grass. Do remember the Solarcaine if you do.
IF YOU ARE A YANKEE AND HAVE JUST MOVED TO THE SOUTH
You need to find out what roundworms and pinworms are. Your kids will have them at some time in their life. Just be aware and don't disregard the symptoms. And you think head lice were bad.
MISSISSIPPI RIVER FLOODS
Got a tip for you. Don't buy a house in a flood plain. If you do build it on stilts a few feet higher than the worst ever level. Also take out the Federal Flood Insurance. Every 100 years or so all rivers flood at record levels. I do feel sorry for the farmers who plant that rich flood plain soil. Of course they knew what they were doing when they bought the land and knew they would have flooding.
ALWAYS MORE TO COME - check back soon
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